Make your own free website on Tripod.com

JOKES & STORIES



THE BURGLAR & JESUS

Late one night, a burglar broke into a house that he thought was empty. Once inside he tiptoed through the living room but suddenly he froze in his tracks when he heard a loud voice say: "JESUS IS WATCHING YOU!"

Silence returned to the house, so the burglar crept forward again.

"JESUS IS WATCHING YOU," the voice boomed again.

The burglar stopped dead in his tracks again. This time he was frightened. Frantically, he looked all around. Over in a dark corner, he spotted a bird cage and in the cage was a parrot.

He asked the parrot: "Was that you who said Jesus is watching me?"

"Yes", said the parrot.

The burglar smiled and breathed a sigh of relief, then he asked the parrot: "What's your name?"

"Clarence," said the parrot.

"That's a dumb name for a parrot," sneered the burglar. "What idiot named you Clarence?"

The parrot says, "The same idiot who named the ROTTWEILER Jesus.


THE TRAIN RIDE

Three engineers and three accountants are travelling by train to a conference.

At the station, the three accountants each buy tickets and watch as the three engineers buy only a single ticket.

"How are three people going to travel on only one ticket?" asks an accountant.

"Watch and you'll see," answers an engineer.

They all board the train. The accountants take their respective seats but all three engineers cram into a restroom and close the door behind them.

Shortly after the train has departed, the conductor comes around collecting tickets.

He knocks on the restroom door and says, "Ticket, please" .

The door opens just a crack and a single arm emerges with a ticket in hand. The conductor takes it and moves on.

The accountants saw this and agreed it was a clever idea. So after the conference, the accountants decide to copy the engineers on the return trip and save some money (being clever with money, and all that).

When they get to the station, they buy a single ticket for the return trip. To their astonishment, the engineers don't buy a ticket at all.

"How are you going to travel without a ticket?" says one perplexed accountant.

"Watch and you'll see," answers an engineer.

When they board the train the three accountants cram into a restroom and the three engineers cram into another one nearby. The train departs. Shortly afterward, one of the engineers leaves his restroom and walks over to the restroom where the accountants are hiding.

He knocks on the door and says, "Ticket, please" .


Comments or questions write to us.

E-Mail Letter

madrottie@hotmail.com


[ HOME ] [ BREED CHARACTERISTICS ] [ REQUEST FOR INFORMATION ] [ FAVORITE LINKS ] [ BREED HISTORY ]

[ M & W KENNEL HISTORY ] [ FREE MAP TO OUR LOCATION ] [ GOD'S KINGDOM ] [ COPYRIGHT INFORMATION ]

[ SUGGESTED READINGS ] [ COOL LINKS ] [ OUR LOCATION ]

[ JOKES & STORIES ] [ A DOG'S PLEA ] [ FREE K-9 TIPS ]


©1997 by:Daniel L. Peart
WEBMASTER